e—that
you would be so sure of the truth that I would have to lie through my teeth
for hours to even plant the
seed of doubt in your head。 I lied; and I'm so sorry—sorry because I hurt
you; sorry because it was a
worthless effort。 Sorry that I couldn't protect you from what I an。 I lied to
save you; and it didn't work。
I'm sorry。
〃But how could you believe me? After all the thousand times I've told you I
love you; how could you let
one word break your faith in me?〃
I didn't answer。 I was too shocked to form a rational response。
〃I could see it in your eyes; that you honestly believed that I didn't want
you anymore。 The most absurd;
ridiculous concept—as if there were anu way that I could exist without
needing you!〃
I was still frozen。 His words were inprehensible; because they were
impossible。
He shook my shoulder again; not hard; but enough that my teeth rattled a
little。
〃Bella;〃 he sighed。 〃Really; what were you thinking!〃
And so I started to cry。 The tears welled up and then gushed miserably down my
cheeks。
〃I knew it;〃 I sobbed。 〃I knew I was dreaming。〃
〃You're impossible;〃 he said; and he laughed once—a hard laugh; frustrated。
〃How can I put this so that
you'll believe me? You're not asleep; and you're not dead。 I'm here; and I
love you。 I have always loved
you; and I will always love you。 I was thinking of you; seeing your face in my
mind; every second that I
was away。 When I told you that I didn't want you; it was the very blackest
kind of blasphemy。〃
I shook my head while the tears continued to ooze from the corners of my eyes。
〃You d