；　making　my　tone

as　light　as　I　could

manage。

My　attempt　worked；　to　an　extent：　he　laughed。　But　his　eyes　retained　the　misery。

〃Your　things　were　never

gone；〃　he　told　me。　〃I　knew　it　was　wrong；　since　I　promised　you　peace　without

reminders。　It　was　stupid

and　childish；　but　I　wanted　to　leave　something　of　myself　with　you。　The　CD；　the

pictures；　the

tickets—they're　all　under　your　floorboards。〃

〃Really？〃

He　nodded；　seeming　slightly　cheered　by　my　obvious　pleasure　in　this　trivial

fact。　It　wasn't　enough　to　heal

the　pain　in　his　face　pletely。

〃I　think；〃　I　said　slowly；　〃I'm　not　sure；　but　I　wonder　I　think　maybe　I　knew

it　the　whole　time。〃

〃What　did　you　know？〃

I　only　wanted　to　take　away　the　agony　in　his　eyes；　but　as　I　spoke　the　words；

they　sounded　truer　than　I

expected　they　would。

〃Some　part　of　me；　my　subconscious　maybe；　never　stopped　believing　that　you

still　cared　whether　I　lived

or　died。　That's　probably　why　I　was　hearing　the　voices。〃

There　was　a　very　deep　silence　for　a　moment。　〃Voices？〃　he　asked　flatly。

〃Well；　just　one　voice。　Yours。　It's　a　long　story。〃　The　wary　look　on　his　face

made　me　wish　that　I　hadn't

brought　that　up。　Would　he　think　I　was　crazy；　like　everyone　else？　Was　everyone

else　right　about　that？　But

at　least　that　expression—the　one　that　made　him　look　like　something　was

burning　him—faded。

〃I've　got　time。〃　His　voice　was　unnaturally　even。

〃It's　pretty　pathetic。〃

He　waited。

I　wasn't　sure　how　to　explain。　〃Do　you　remember　what　Alice　said　about　extreme

sports？〃

He　spoke　the　words　without　inflection　or　emphasis。　〃You　jumped　off　a　cliff　for

f