e　shock。

I　lay　still　in　my　bed　for　a　few　minutes；　waiting　for　it　to　e　back。　Because

something　must　be　ing。　If

not　the　pain；　then　the　numbness。　I　waited；　but　nothing　happened。　I　felt　more

rested　than　I　had　in　a　long

time。

I　didn't　trust　this　to　last。　It　was　a　slippery；　precarious　edge　that　I

balanced　on；　and　it　wouldn't　take　much

to　knock　me　back　down。　Just　glancing　around　my　room　with　these　suddenly　clear

eyes—noticing　how

strange　it　looked；　too　tidy；　like　I　didn't　live　here　at　all—was　dangerous。

I　pushed　that　thought　from　my　mind；　and　concentrated；　as　I　got　dressed；　on　the

fact　that　I　was　going　to

see　Jacob　again　today。　The　thought　made　me　feel　almost　hopeful。　Maybe　it

would　be　the　same　as

yesterday。　Maybe　I　wouldn't　have　to　remind　myself　to　look　interested　and　to

nod　or　smile　at　appropriate

intervals；　the　way　I　had　to　with　everyone　else。　Maybe　but　I　wouldn't　trust

this　to　last；　either。　Wouldn't

trust　it　to　be　the　same—so　easy—as　yesterday。　I　wasn't　going　to　set　myself

up　for　disappointment　like

that。

At　breakfast；　Charlie　was　being　careful；　too。　He　tried　to　hide　his　scrutiny；

keeping　his　eyes　on　his　eggs

until　he　thought　I　wasn't　looking。

〃What　are　you　up　to　today？〃　he　asked；　eyeing　a　loose　thread　on　the　edge　of　his

cuff　like　he　wasn't　paying

much　attention　to　my　answer。

〃I'm　going　to　hang　out　with　Jacob　again。〃

He　nodded　without　looking　up。　〃Oh；〃　he　said。

〃Do　you　mind？〃　I　pretended　to　worry。　〃I　could　stay〃

He　glanced　up　quickly；　a　hint　of　panic　in　his　eyes。　〃No；　no！　You　go　ahead。

Harry　was　going　to　e　up

to　watch　the　game　with　me　anyway。〃