ked。　I　threw　myself　into　the

search　for　the　meadow　with　slightly　frenzied　intensity。　I　racked　my　brain　for

other　adrenaline…producing

activities。

I　didn't　keep　track　of　the　days　：hat　passed—there　was　no　reason；　as　I　tried

to　live　as　much　in　the　present

as　possible；　no　past　fading；　no　future　impending。　So　I　was　surprised　by　the

date　when　Jacob　brought　it

up　on　one　of　our　homework　days。　He　was　waiting　when　I　pulled　up　in　front　of

his　house。

〃Happy　Valentine's　Day；〃　Jacob　said；　smiling；　but　ducking　his　head　as　he

greeted　me。

He　held　out　a　small；　pink　box；　balancing　it　on　his　palm。　Conversation　hearts。

〃Well；　I　feel　like　a　schmuck；〃　I　mumbled。　〃Is　today　Valentine's　Day？〃

Jacob　shook　his　head　with　mock　sadness。　〃You　can　be　so　out　of　it　sometimes。

Yes；　it　is　the　fourteenth

day　of　February。　So　are　you　going　to　be　my　Valentine？　Since　you　didn't　get　me

a　fifty…cent　box　of　candy；

it's　the　least　you　can　do。〃

I　started　to　feel　unfortable。　The　words　were　teasing；　but　only　on　the

surface。

〃What　exactly　does　that　entail？〃　I　hedged。

〃The　usual—slave　for　life；　that　kind　of　thing。〃

〃Oh；　well；　if　that's　all〃　I　took　the　candy。　But　I　was　trying　to　think　of

some　way　to　make　the　boundaries

clear。　Again。　They　seemed　to　get　blurred　a　lot　with　Jacob。

〃So；　what　are　we　doing　tomorrow？　Hiking；　or　the　ER？〃

〃Hiking；〃　I　decided。　〃You're　not　the　only　one　who　can　be　obsessive。　I'm

starting　to　think　I　imagined　that

place〃　I　frowned　into　space。

〃We'll　find　it；〃　he　assured　me。　〃Bikes　Friday？〃　he　offered。

I　saw　a　chance　and　took　it　without　taking　time　to　think　it　through。

〃I'm　going　to　a